💬 Too Much, Not Enough, and Exactly Right
There are people who don’t like me.
Sometimes, I welcome that — even feel proud of it. I joke that “they’re probably holding whole-ass meetings about me,” and honestly? Let them. If my presence rattles the systems they benefit from, then I must be doing something right.
But behind that brave face… is me.
Just me.
Still hoping to be liked.
Still worrying that I’m too loud, too much, too messy, too “mouthy.”
And at the same time — not enough. Not polished enough. Not business-y enough. Not soft enough. Not healed enough to be building a whole platform and inviting people into it.
That’s the hard place I live in: between too much and not enough, still trying to build something real.
I read the testimonials people wrote about me — beautiful, affirming words about my leadership, my compassion, my impact. And part of me believes them. But another part? She whispers that maybe I’m making it all up. Maybe I’ve fooled people. Maybe it’s just survivor shine — all sparkle, no center.
That voice is an old one.
She sounds like fear.
She sounds like trauma.
She sounds like every time I was told to shrink so others could be comfortable.
And she’s still here.
But now? She’s not driving.
I let her speak. I even let her sit beside me. But she doesn’t get to steer the direction of my life anymore.
Because here’s the truth: people not liking me doesn’t mean I’m unlikable. It means I’m showing up. It means I’m saying hard things in places where silence has long been the rule. It means I’m not hiding anymore.
And even when I worry that I’m too much…
Even when I ache with the fear that I’m not enough…
I keep going.
Because every time I show up — to speak, to write, to build, to rest — I’m building something I would’ve needed when I was still in the fire.
And someone else needs it now.
So let them hold their meetings.
I’ll be over here, building something real — as I am.
Too much.
Not enough.
And exactly right.
🌿 You Are Not Alone
If you’ve ever felt caught in that same tension — too much, not enough — just know: you are not alone. And you are so very wanted here.